Filtering Commitments

Jeff commented on my previous post about commitment, in “A Chance to Serve.”  I want to post in order to clarify and tease out more on the subject matter of commitment.  Enjoy!

Thanks for the reply Jeff.  You provide sincere, thoughtful, and godly feedback.  I certainly want to see people keeping commitments they have made, whatever the previous obligation.  That said, everybody has a more nuanced idea of commitment in how it unfolds practically than, “do what you’ll say you’ll do.”  I know you’re not saying this, but I write this post for the benefit of us all in thinking more deeply about what priorities and commitments really entail.

We mentally go through assessing priority ranking when two things come into conflict.  We each craft our own filter that rates affinity to 2 or more competing commitments.  What I’m seeking in this post is to discuss filter refinement with God at the center.

Thank you for helping me see my need to be more careful.  I have not been clear.  I am very sorry.  I do think sports, band, choir, or service projects can very much truly be on the same level as God honoring and God glorifying commitments.  My apologies, for not lending my language to be clear on that.  Allow me a second crack at taking a stab on this topic.

What I am raising is the question is on our commitment filter.  When two commitments present themselves, which wins out?  The first factor can tend to be, “how personally enjoyable is each commitment to me?”  The commitment which is more “fun” can tend to win out.  Adults usually have more extensive commitment ranking filters than youth.  I want to help people think of more nuanced filters when commitments conflict.

Another filter is what some students told me they use when it comes to their commitments to school and homework.  That filter is as follows.  Where ramifications and consequences are most severe, those are the commitments which are kept.  For school that might mean bad grades, exclusion from certain colleges, or detention as consequences.  For sports teams that might mean not playing in the next game.

Youth ministry has few parallels.  We can threaten to cut the “fun” activities.  I’m not a fan of this, and don’t like to make use of threatening consequences in my church position to elicit commitment follow through.  I don’t think Jesus is too fond of getting this sort of consequence driven commitment out of people.  I’d rather exhaust some other options first.

I certainly want to see commitments kept.  Whether that is band, choir, sports, service projects, whatever the case may be.  Let me again restate (because I feel I was unclear in writings elsewhere), there are a wide variety of activities that can be equally as God honoring and God glorifying.  Youth ministry activities has no foothold as “better than” or more “godly” than other commitments.

What I am advocating is that ministry and service projects (when commitment is made) should rival and compete with other commitments as a legitimate commitment.  This then brings multiple commitments on the same playing field, where 2 time commitments may be asked to compete against one another.  I simply do not want to see ministry commitments take a continual back sit because, “I had other commitments.”  The ministry commitment level should be given equal weight.  Sometimes one, sometimes the other might win out.  That is fine.  In fact, I think that is healthy many times.  I just don’t like to see lopsided landslides all the time.

I do want “freedom in Christ” to win out, not ministry.  This brings me to following point which I illustrated 2 different ways to both Middle School and High School students.  I will share one of those ways here.  On a hand out sheet I made a point to cross out the wrong-headed question pertaining to commitment.  The question read as follows.  “Where does your commitment to this ministry fall among all your other commitments?”  I made a point and had everyone cross out that question.  We discussed how being committed to a ministry is not the point.  We replaced the question with the following.  “Where does your commitment to God fall among all your other commitments?”  I told everyone I don’t want to see ministry raising to the God position.  There is nothing magical about a ministry commitment that makes it leap other commitments.  What I am seeking is a “serving other” and “putting others’ interests before our own” filter to gain traction to compete for more time in our commitment aligning filter process.  This godly filter value assists in making sure God is at the center of one’s filter.  (I used different words with the students.)

What might one choose to do?  Someone may say, “youth movement is Sunday, sports practice is every night, and God is at the center.”  That is wonderful.  One should exercise one’s freedom in Christ to then glorify God in their sports commitment just as they strive to do in other commitments.  But no lip service.  Really strive to be a light for God on the field!  Someone else may say, “I want to decide to corporately participate in service projects over my other commitments.”  This person may then at the beginning of every sports season inform the coach that sometimes they will be unable to attend practice because of their chosen decision in their commitment filter.  But no lip service here either.  Really strive to glorify God in these activities!  A third person will have a different filter.  As long as God is at work in the commitment filtering system, I am tickled fancy, because God is in place to be glorified in all commitments.

In conclusion, no one can keep all commitments 24/7.  We have to pick and choose.  We all use a mental process of filtering commitments when obligations conflict.  Which activity I committed to first “wins out “is often times a great filtering mechanism.  However, we also have other ways of prioritizing.  A death in the family is going to win out over mostly anything else.  There are a ton of commitment and prioritizing filters we may use.  What is also a filtering mechanism to help get God in the center is asking, “How am I making a time commitment in serving to others, thereby putting others’ interests before my own?  Is ‘serving others’ first’ part of my life commitment?”

On a sidenote: Many of you do not know Jeff.  I have the privilege of knowing him.  Jeff is a great guy, and has shown me God many times over, on multiple levels, in multiple ways!

I hope everyone continues with me as God provides us new ways to think about commitment, priorities, and making sure God is at the center of our commitment filter system.  I thank you for your commitment in reading this long long post!