Ever hear of flight attendants, weddings, and funerals being grouped together? Yeah, me neither. But the grouping actually makes sense. Well, at least that’s what writers tell themselves even if reality betrays them with an awkward disjointed mess on paper. But here, I think I can bring flight attendants, weddings, and funerals to sit together at the same table. Let’s listen to what we can learn from this curious grouping.
I will present us with one connection/comparison joining this triad of odd ducks. The comparison to make is how the person in charge of each of these three roles is heard and received. Do people listen to the flight attendant? What about the pastor officiating a wedding? And lastly, how about the pastor performing a funeral?
Let’s look at each of these three separately. Take the flight attendant first. When the flight attendant is going through the safety instructions before take off does anybody pay attention? No. Although, very important should problems arise during the flight, the flight attendant instructions are traded for worthless magazines in the seats in front of them as people won’t even fake like they’re giving him or her their listening ear. So flight attendants get little respect when it comes to their voice and instruction being heard.
How about the pastor officiating the wedding. Any better luck here? Not much argues one pastor I recently questioned on this topic. Pastors doing weddings are little more than ornaments and fixtures on the wedding day. Most attending don’t care about their message, so they make it brief. The guests aren’t there to hear a sermon, they’re there to see the couple kiss, the dress, the flowers, family, and friends. So sorry pastors doing weddings. (I being one) Don’t get an overinflated sense of your significance that day. You may be very significant to God in articulating the marriage covenant, but rest assured those guests who you don’t know didn’t come to listen to you. They probably won’t listen to your message a whole lot more than that of the flight attendant (even though they’ll politely pacify you by faking it). You’re just a hood ornament. A little bit like those silly plastic bride and groom pieces on top of wedding cakes. But don’t let that effect your self worth. Being grouped together with flight attendants is just fine. It just comes with the territory of your job that day, and not a reflection on your person hood. I’ve met many super nice flight attendants, so you’re in good company.
On to the pastor at the funeral. Had a discussion with my pastor friend on this one as well. His thought was that here, people are actually looking for the pastor. Only out of these three, flight attendant, weddings, and funerals, does the pastor at the funeral get heard. People are looking and listening for the pastor’s words at this juncture. The grief and vulnerability at this painful moment of losing a loved one makes for somewhat more open ears to what the pastor has to say. So, if people look to you, regardless of your “spiritual title,” seize their attention in these moments and talk about the depth of Jesus.
Wrapping it up, people don’t listen to everyone equally. Do people trample upon your words like that of a flight attendant? Do they fake listen like at a wedding ceremony? Or do they cling to your words like you’re speaking to the depths of their being? If people shrug you off, maybe a humility pill is in order, and you need to try listening to others first if you also desire to be heard.
We all have relationships where that one person thinks they’re the expert on everything and you listen to nothing they say and for good reason. You know the guy I’m talking about. He’s the forty year old socially awkward guy who lives with his mom but talks your ear off giving you marriage advice. That person has lost their marbles. But in other relationships you have bated breath and are at the edge of your seat ready to soak in everything the person has to say. Gifted communicators that I respect the most are first gifted listeners. The best communicate with one ear to the human predicament and one ear to the divine perspective.
Just another post to ponder effective communication, hearing, listening, and receiving. The breadth in which we can communicate is quite impressive. We can communicate with weight, or we can communicate with words that pass away in the wind.
